George Floyd.... I'm grateful you are changing the world. My heart hurts for you, and your family and every black, every one that has ever unjustly suffered at the hands of our racist system, at the hands of our racist police force, at the hands of our racist nation...at the hands of HATE.
First, I have to say that the foundation of this country I call home is built upon raping, pillaging, stealing, murder, slavery, oppression and corrupt politics. It does not have a solid voting system. It works the way it was set up to work. It is NOT broken....it is about to be.
SO many hundreds of years of lies are intertwined, making the foundation of this country unstable with holes and cracks all up in it...making it impossible to build a solid, loving, honest and equal society.
So now, we have a hurting nation, a hurting world, that is about to gut the system and dissolve the feeble foundation of this country....
WE are about to redefine and rebuild the foundation of Human Kind. The reform, the bandaid, isn't going to suffice this time.
George Floyd's brutal murder just woke up the soul of this Earth and lit her on fire.... the mama bear woke up from hibernation, hungry and fed up.
As I attend these protests, starting with the ones that ensued directly after George Floyd's death.... I have learned our 1st Amendment isn't real. I have learned the militarized police force are the aggressors. If we really think about it, we are showing up to these protests BECAUSE of the injustice and abuse of power of the system and police force.
We don't have rights. If we did, we wouldn't be protesting the murders of our black communities, because there wouldn't be any.
I have learned I can trust the incredible communities of protesters that come from all walks of life. I have been reminded the power IS in the people. I have learned to keep learning... I'm staying open to the pain of others, to the journey and struggles of our people.
The communities at these protests are truly amazing. Complete strangers are feeding one another, nourishing one another, supporting each other, standing for others even in times of danger.....black, white, asian, etc....it doesn't matter. We are all a community with love and passion that has turned into fire.
We are all there because we are outraged by the constant injustice, by the abuse of power, by the violence and murders..... outraged because these families are broken, loved ones taken from them..... our love for justice, our love for the victims, our love for their families.... our love for our community is showing up in force, in anger, in rage.... it's a deep, deep kind of love. It's a soul kind of love.
I'm white. I was born white. I'm not sorry, it's just the skin I was given this lifetime.
My heart hurts for every injustice everywhere.
At these protests, I have heard some black speakers talk about the white people in a way that continues the segregation.
I'm here. My voice is loud, my heart feels the oppression, my soul burns for truth and justice in our communities of all colors. Empaths also come in all colors.
I walk out the door and I'm white. I get that. Just like you, I can't change my color of skin. I don't have the same concerns when I walk out the door. I'm not in immediate danger of being judged or murdered at any given moment.
I can however, speak loud and from my heart, stand on the front line, empathize, sympathize, assist, support and honor the struggles and challenges of others. Don't suppress your people. Don't suppress your white, human family during these times of change where ALL of our voices need to be heard. If we are going to stand, we need to stand together. We are there to abolish segregation....it starts today, with US. We are better together. Let my fire burn bright alongside yours....our flames together will be seen and the heat cannot go ignored.....
#ThisIsAnUprising
~Ain't no power like the power of people, and the power of people won't stop.
Sunday, June 28, 2020
Monday, October 31, 2016
The Sudden Lovely Ranch
The Sudden Lovely Ranch
The
Sudden Lovely Ranch (SLR) has been brought to life in the oddest and most stunning
ways. From poverty and homelessness, to
love and today’s success, it has been anything but a simple ride. This healing and beautiful space has taken a
lot of work and an ability to embrace the unexpected. When visitors arrive, there’s only joy,
amazement and a sense of home, thanks to the many animals, the beautiful views,
and the good food and company that occupies this land. Let’s talk about how it began…
Jenae was facing a lot of
difficulty in the spring of 2013. As a
single mom of six children, she faced challenges that most cannot
comprehend. Committed to an organic,
healthy, and wholesome lifestyle, she often faced public criticism for choosing
quality food and education for the kids, although this often made it hard to
pay bills or keep a stable roof over their heads. She stuck to it, and sacrificed unimaginably
and kept a hopeful and positive outlook entirely. One day, fate brought her to a safe and
beautiful home, occupied by a man she’d known in passing for years. This place would later become known as The
Sudden Lovely Ranch and would change their lives forever.
The man was Steven “Woody," a local handyman and cattle rancher.
He had deep roots in the community and had
actually vaguely met Jenae six or so years ago, through the local co-op. He had a large room, an open kitchen and a
kind heart, and when Jenae was facing the most challenging moment yet, he
offered this place for her to stay and the chance to settle back into a
community that she once loved and knew.
She accepted, squeezed three beds into a cozy room, and began coexisting
with this generous guy she’d hardly known before.
Three
months went by in the blink of an eye, and Woody and Jenae shared many evenings
chatting. Woody also took a particular
interest in teaching the kids outdoor skills like hunting, fishing, wood
chopping, fence building, and cattle herding.
As a mother, Jenae noticed and was moved by how Woody served as a
natural role model, living the way she’d always taught her boys to be, in terms
of ‘gentlemanly’ conduct and respectful living.
His vision for life and for his home were not unlike hers, and he too
began to feel deeply about this visionary, powerful woman that had suddenly
filled a once quiet space with laughter, love, and the footsteps of many
beloved children.
One
August night, at the wedding of an old friend, Jenae and Woody looked at each
other and both suddenly realized they were actually quite in love. It was fateful. They were both a little nervous about what
this new relationship might mean for the future, and trust took a long time to
build, as the family was still in what most would call ‘survival mode’, because
things had been so hard. Fortunately, time
only showed that both partners’ commitments were deepening, and the following
year the ranch began to blossom.
It
started with chickens, as well as a connection to a local Alpaca rancher. Bette, a rancher in her 70s, was needing help
with her large ranch and wanting to help, Jenae took the youngest boys of the
family, Malik and Keenan, to help scoop poop and care for Bette’s Alpacas. Bette was generous and saw that this family
truly loved the animals. She provided fencing
and gifted seven Alpacas to Jenae for keeping.
This started a process of unexpected healing for the family and growth
for the ranch.
Over the following couple of years,
ducks were ordered in the mail, to bring in duck eggs and meat, and of course,
geese followed. The garden was restored
each summer to grow more and more bountifully.
There was never a dull moment, as both Jenae and Woody were managing a
large family, jobs, and building the ranch in spare moments, including building
a greenhouse, building chicken coops, fencing in multiple acres of land, and
more. The work was endless but so was
the abundance, and today, the ranch is thriving, with yak, cows, and even a
lizard. The name stems from Jenae and
Woody’s affection for a favorite band named “The Sudden Lovelies”… And so to
those sweet tunes, the Sudden Lovely Ranch has danced its way into the hearts
of many.
Neighbors and community members
gather greens, veggies, eggs, and meat from this ranch and others simply come
up for a good meal and healing space. The
community has truly brought this place together, along with the good intent and
love of an unexpected pair, Jenae and Woody.
The kids, Shaylee, 24, Tiana, 17, Jayden, 15, Isaiah, 13, Malik, 10, and
Keenan, 7, are all doing incredibly well.
Shaylee works with survivors of Traumatic Brain Injuries in Denver, CO,
and visits whenever she has time. The
other five are still home, succeeding in school and ranching at home. They are able to eat and cook shared, wholesome
meals, much of it sourced from the farm or from the cattle raised by Woody,
just like Jenae had always dreamed.
Here at the ranch, life has a whole different set of challenges to the family that was once struggling to put gas in the car
and pay rent. It's a balancing act that is worth every ounce of effort. It may take a village to keep the sacred, mountain ranch open and flowing. All who come visit, feel the therapeutic lasting effects of bliss, nature, fresh air and love.
As someone once said, “Not all who wander are lost…” and the Sudden Lovely Ranch seems to have wandered right into existence, changing the lives and spirits of everyone involved.
As someone once said, “Not all who wander are lost…” and the Sudden Lovely Ranch seems to have wandered right into existence, changing the lives and spirits of everyone involved.
Saturday, October 22, 2016
Creating a Sacred Ranch in 3 years!
There is proof that time continues and new chapters are always around the corner! We are still in our safe, loving mountain space....three years later.
Now! We have created this amazing farm with alpacas, chickens, ducks, geese, yak, and cattle, a garden and greenhouse. Each group of animals, with the exception of the birds, found us!
My daughter had a friend, that knew a neighbor of ours, who needed help. Our neighbor had been raising alpacas for years and ended up with 28 of them! She needed help scooping poop, watering and just helping out.
We had been homeschooling the two youngest boys at the time and decided it would be a great experience for all of us to go help on our neighbors ranch. I had wanted alpacas years ago, but they were going for $20K to $40K each! I gave up on that idea. As we worked our neighbors ranch, the boys and I fell in love.
Our neighbor decided she wanted to downsize, and she asked if we wanted to take some of her alpacas. We did have a barn, but it was being used as storage. Woody and I decided to clean out the barn and bring 7 alpacas home. We had a vision to use their fiber and we also knew these animals were just so therapeutic for anyone who would interact with them. The neighbor ended up giving us fencing, gates and alpacas. We've been loving them for about 2 1/2 years now!
The cows? Well, Woody has been working with an elderly neighbor on the land next to ours helping him raise beef cows for the last 4-5 years now. Last year, Woody took over the majority of the labor on that ranch. We ended up keeping two cows through the winter last year....one was the lead steer (our working cow) and the other cow was kept to be a friend and also needed a bit more nourishment. This winter we have our lead steer and our two mama cows will be coming home soon...hopefully pregnant! One of the mama cows was a run away cow from down the road. She showed up at our meadow, fell in love with our lead steer and decided to stay. Her owner, another elderly neighbor, gifted her to us. The other mama cow was one of our cows that Woody gets "paid" with. For Woody's labor on the ranch next door, he is gifted 5 cows a year.
Yak! Oh, yes, the yak! How I love them all! I had been "yakking" Woody's ears off about yak for about 1 1/2-2 years before the yak showed up! Did you know you can feed three yak the same as one beef cow? You can use the yaks fiber (wool), too! The outside of the fiber is waterproof and the inside is like cashmere. Imaging mixing the alpaca fiber with the yak fiber... You can pack a yak up to 300 lbs., you can ride them, milk them, eat their meat (if you're a meat eater) and their immune system is fabulous! They don't have a tendency to get hoof rot or pink eye like cows do. Yak are lighter on the land, non aggressive by nature and just magestic animals. They can hold their own with predators and don't need much shelter, if any.
Woody was hesitant about trying to get yak. He didn't know much about them, with the exception of what I kept repeating in his ear year after year! We also knew we couldn't afford them.
Some friends of ours knew some locals who were being kicked off their land. These locals had yak on their land and weren't sure what they were going to do. They had about a month or so to move the small herd. They found out from our mutual friends that Jenae loves yak and that we had land.
We all came together and decided that we would take in their yak until further notice.
The very first night the yak were in our meadow, one of them birthed. The owners had said they had no idea if any of the mamas were pregnant.
Woody and I had watched as the bull sniffed the mama from behind (it wasn't mating season) and then the mama walked off on her own into our aspen forest. I thought it was weird the mama would walk off by herself and told Woody that she was looking for a place to birth. We were both so side tracked by it all, we kind of blew it off and walked away.
The next morning, we were standing with a neighbor in our driveway looking at this really strange cloud that was hovering over our meadow. We talked about it for a few moments. Shortly thereafter, the baby yak came out of the meadow!! Yes, his name is Cloud. The owners of the yak gifted us the baby. We have now been hand raising him so we can create a small herd to pack out with, ride, use their fiber, have them work the ranch and possibly milk them in the future. We still house and love the other 6 adult yak. They are all so perfect.
Dreams, manifestation, blessings abound! Life is incredible.
Now! We have created this amazing farm with alpacas, chickens, ducks, geese, yak, and cattle, a garden and greenhouse. Each group of animals, with the exception of the birds, found us!
My daughter had a friend, that knew a neighbor of ours, who needed help. Our neighbor had been raising alpacas for years and ended up with 28 of them! She needed help scooping poop, watering and just helping out.
We had been homeschooling the two youngest boys at the time and decided it would be a great experience for all of us to go help on our neighbors ranch. I had wanted alpacas years ago, but they were going for $20K to $40K each! I gave up on that idea. As we worked our neighbors ranch, the boys and I fell in love.
Our neighbor decided she wanted to downsize, and she asked if we wanted to take some of her alpacas. We did have a barn, but it was being used as storage. Woody and I decided to clean out the barn and bring 7 alpacas home. We had a vision to use their fiber and we also knew these animals were just so therapeutic for anyone who would interact with them. The neighbor ended up giving us fencing, gates and alpacas. We've been loving them for about 2 1/2 years now!
The cows? Well, Woody has been working with an elderly neighbor on the land next to ours helping him raise beef cows for the last 4-5 years now. Last year, Woody took over the majority of the labor on that ranch. We ended up keeping two cows through the winter last year....one was the lead steer (our working cow) and the other cow was kept to be a friend and also needed a bit more nourishment. This winter we have our lead steer and our two mama cows will be coming home soon...hopefully pregnant! One of the mama cows was a run away cow from down the road. She showed up at our meadow, fell in love with our lead steer and decided to stay. Her owner, another elderly neighbor, gifted her to us. The other mama cow was one of our cows that Woody gets "paid" with. For Woody's labor on the ranch next door, he is gifted 5 cows a year.
Yak! Oh, yes, the yak! How I love them all! I had been "yakking" Woody's ears off about yak for about 1 1/2-2 years before the yak showed up! Did you know you can feed three yak the same as one beef cow? You can use the yaks fiber (wool), too! The outside of the fiber is waterproof and the inside is like cashmere. Imaging mixing the alpaca fiber with the yak fiber... You can pack a yak up to 300 lbs., you can ride them, milk them, eat their meat (if you're a meat eater) and their immune system is fabulous! They don't have a tendency to get hoof rot or pink eye like cows do. Yak are lighter on the land, non aggressive by nature and just magestic animals. They can hold their own with predators and don't need much shelter, if any.
Woody was hesitant about trying to get yak. He didn't know much about them, with the exception of what I kept repeating in his ear year after year! We also knew we couldn't afford them.
Some friends of ours knew some locals who were being kicked off their land. These locals had yak on their land and weren't sure what they were going to do. They had about a month or so to move the small herd. They found out from our mutual friends that Jenae loves yak and that we had land.
We all came together and decided that we would take in their yak until further notice.
The very first night the yak were in our meadow, one of them birthed. The owners had said they had no idea if any of the mamas were pregnant.
Woody and I had watched as the bull sniffed the mama from behind (it wasn't mating season) and then the mama walked off on her own into our aspen forest. I thought it was weird the mama would walk off by herself and told Woody that she was looking for a place to birth. We were both so side tracked by it all, we kind of blew it off and walked away.
The next morning, we were standing with a neighbor in our driveway looking at this really strange cloud that was hovering over our meadow. We talked about it for a few moments. Shortly thereafter, the baby yak came out of the meadow!! Yes, his name is Cloud. The owners of the yak gifted us the baby. We have now been hand raising him so we can create a small herd to pack out with, ride, use their fiber, have them work the ranch and possibly milk them in the future. We still house and love the other 6 adult yak. They are all so perfect.
Dreams, manifestation, blessings abound! Life is incredible.
Monday, March 10, 2014
In a Sacred Space...Now Healing Begins!
We've been "surviving" for SO long....actually, my whole life has been just that. The kids have also been on that same path, until now.
Now we are in such a sacred, stable, loving, supportive environment... all of our emotions are free to surface. We now have space for that....space, time, and a place for healing. Everyone of us are experiencing intense emotions that are coming up to allow healing of old patterns, behaviors, beliefs, and ways of "survival." Everything from anger, jealousy, sadness, mild illness, and just plain confusion has shown up.
I've been dealing with my own "stuff" and holding space for each one of the kiddos to go through theirs. Just trying to hold sacred space for each one of them, their emotions and healing processes.
I have had to trust and recieve....sounds easy, but whoa. Good news is, I am able to recognize that these "irrational" emotions that are surfacing for me are from my past patterns and behaviors that were created in a time of need and survival. There is no need for them in the space I am currently in.
I guess some of the emotions that I am currently experiencing are a result of the fear I am experiencing. Being scared that I will loose all that we have now. Just waiting for that moment when we will be "surviving" once again....let down again....given up all over again.
I am also learning so much and trying to be easy on myself. I get mad at myself for feeling anything but bliss. Life is so incredible right now. I am sifting through all of these feelings, emotions and insecurities. I'm embracing each one, exploring them and looking for ways to heal and release.
I have never been so in love, so loved and adored, so happy and truly safe. What a difference and so healthy. The kids are also in such a new, safe, secure, loving environment. We are all truly grateful and a bit scared.
Life is still amazing....more amazing than ever.
Breathing and allowing it to be. Healing and progressing...our lives have changed for the better. Adjusting to the newness of it all.
I'm super grateful my man is such an anchor and support. He keeps me grounded and holds me in light.
Truly blessed.
Now we are in such a sacred, stable, loving, supportive environment... all of our emotions are free to surface. We now have space for that....space, time, and a place for healing. Everyone of us are experiencing intense emotions that are coming up to allow healing of old patterns, behaviors, beliefs, and ways of "survival." Everything from anger, jealousy, sadness, mild illness, and just plain confusion has shown up.
I've been dealing with my own "stuff" and holding space for each one of the kiddos to go through theirs. Just trying to hold sacred space for each one of them, their emotions and healing processes.
I have had to trust and recieve....sounds easy, but whoa. Good news is, I am able to recognize that these "irrational" emotions that are surfacing for me are from my past patterns and behaviors that were created in a time of need and survival. There is no need for them in the space I am currently in.
I guess some of the emotions that I am currently experiencing are a result of the fear I am experiencing. Being scared that I will loose all that we have now. Just waiting for that moment when we will be "surviving" once again....let down again....given up all over again.
I am also learning so much and trying to be easy on myself. I get mad at myself for feeling anything but bliss. Life is so incredible right now. I am sifting through all of these feelings, emotions and insecurities. I'm embracing each one, exploring them and looking for ways to heal and release.
I have never been so in love, so loved and adored, so happy and truly safe. What a difference and so healthy. The kids are also in such a new, safe, secure, loving environment. We are all truly grateful and a bit scared.
Life is still amazing....more amazing than ever.
Breathing and allowing it to be. Healing and progressing...our lives have changed for the better. Adjusting to the newness of it all.
I'm super grateful my man is such an anchor and support. He keeps me grounded and holds me in light.
Truly blessed.
Sunday, December 15, 2013
A Whole New World
This thing called life is just incredible. What an amazing journey that continues on.
I guess moving out of the area wasn't in the cards. Due to my ex and some higher powers at work, we were forced to stay put.
Thank goodness. What a blessing it turned out to be. ;)
We are still in the same place we moved into in June of this year after moving out of the foreclosed house.
I am now in a serious, amazing, loving, mature, spontaneous, exciting, mutual, beautiful relationship with the man that we moved in with. We've known eachother for 7 years. Neither of us ever knew what we could be together. We have always been friends, kind and genuine. We lived together for two months this summer without even considering being life partners or anything more than friends.
In August, things changed. I asked him to my sister's wedding. I told him we could just go as friends. I knew I didn't want anything more.
We had such a great time. We snuggled, held hands, talked, danced a bit, and hung out with friends and family together.
We both felt something different that night, but waited for another couple of days after the wedding to act on it.
What an incredible life we've been living together since! It's been so smooth and almost effortless the way things have fallen into place. The kids love him and he loves them. I love him and he loves me....in ways I have never experienced. It's such a beautiful thing.
It's surreal and SO real at the same time.
I feel so connected to him. Our lives have quietly merged.
I now have to learn how to stop all of my habits of "survival" and independence. I don't have to give up my independence, but I sometimes forget that I now have someone who wants to and who will hold me up, help me out, love me...someone who is now part of me and has taken on all that I have.
He loves this family and sees the beauty of it all. This is his family....it just is.
xoxo
Breathing freely and loving immensely....
The kids are in school and loving it for the most part. I still have a vision of having them home...but I also want whatever is best for them. They are right where they are supposed to be for now.
I've learned SO much along the way. I am grateful.
I guess moving out of the area wasn't in the cards. Due to my ex and some higher powers at work, we were forced to stay put.
Thank goodness. What a blessing it turned out to be. ;)
We are still in the same place we moved into in June of this year after moving out of the foreclosed house.
I am now in a serious, amazing, loving, mature, spontaneous, exciting, mutual, beautiful relationship with the man that we moved in with. We've known eachother for 7 years. Neither of us ever knew what we could be together. We have always been friends, kind and genuine. We lived together for two months this summer without even considering being life partners or anything more than friends.
In August, things changed. I asked him to my sister's wedding. I told him we could just go as friends. I knew I didn't want anything more.
We had such a great time. We snuggled, held hands, talked, danced a bit, and hung out with friends and family together.
We both felt something different that night, but waited for another couple of days after the wedding to act on it.
What an incredible life we've been living together since! It's been so smooth and almost effortless the way things have fallen into place. The kids love him and he loves them. I love him and he loves me....in ways I have never experienced. It's such a beautiful thing.
It's surreal and SO real at the same time.
I feel so connected to him. Our lives have quietly merged.
I now have to learn how to stop all of my habits of "survival" and independence. I don't have to give up my independence, but I sometimes forget that I now have someone who wants to and who will hold me up, help me out, love me...someone who is now part of me and has taken on all that I have.
He loves this family and sees the beauty of it all. This is his family....it just is.
xoxo
Breathing freely and loving immensely....
The kids are in school and loving it for the most part. I still have a vision of having them home...but I also want whatever is best for them. They are right where they are supposed to be for now.
I've learned SO much along the way. I am grateful.
Thursday, July 4, 2013
On and On!
I just received an email about Tiana's ACCEPTANCE to an amazing school down south!!! Jayden already had a spot and the boys are on the waiting list. Yay!
This was the ONLY thing "semi" weighing on me....my kids in public schools next year. Three different, huge, public schools...naaaahhhh! Not happening!
A beautiful, small, incredible, FREE, public, CHARTER school has accepted Tiana into their high school program. The high school has a total of 24 students.... a total! This school is a pre-K through 12 school that has been around since '96.
Tiana had to go through an interview process with the school. She had to write an essay on her strengths and weaknesses as a student, young adult and citizen of the world.
Not only did she write a phenomenal essay......she wrote it in caligraphy, put it on scroll paper WITH a red ribbon tied around it! THAT is my creative, most amazing, 14-year-old strong, young lady!!
I wrote an essay explaining why I support Tiana in her decision to join this program/school and what I would be able to offer the school.
Tiana then went through an interview process with the teachers and administration. I sat in with her as she answered questions and came up with questions for each one of them. It went perfect and we really had connections with all of the incredible staff.
At first, Tiana was not accepted. They were sad to say, all four spots had been filled and Tiana was the runner up. We left feeling okay with that....thinking we just weren't meant to move to that area.
The email yesterday said that one of the students dropped the program because they were moving out of the area and Tiana now has the option of enrolling in their program!!
We're taking it. This is happening.
What a beautiful school, in a like-minded, small, mountain community....yay! It will not be our old school, or our old community....but, I have a feeling it will be a similar feel.
The boys are on the waiting list. Meanwhile, there is a small public school that will do. They also have a preschool for Keenan.
All of this in a small town....less driving and gas $$. Buses run to both schools, SO much organic around, beautiful people- all encompassing a similar respect for the earth and everything on it, around it, in it....just aware and present.
It feels really good.
Middle and High School years are such important and intense times for everyone. I truly want my girls in a nourishing, strengthening, supportive environment during these years. A sacred place with unlimited growth potential.....we got it. ;)
My boys will be in soon enough. Until then, this ultimate warrior mama is ready for holding it down at home....providing that foundation and support while they journey through their days.
Grateful!!! So, so grateful!! xoxo
This was the ONLY thing "semi" weighing on me....my kids in public schools next year. Three different, huge, public schools...naaaahhhh! Not happening!
A beautiful, small, incredible, FREE, public, CHARTER school has accepted Tiana into their high school program. The high school has a total of 24 students.... a total! This school is a pre-K through 12 school that has been around since '96.
Tiana had to go through an interview process with the school. She had to write an essay on her strengths and weaknesses as a student, young adult and citizen of the world.
Not only did she write a phenomenal essay......she wrote it in caligraphy, put it on scroll paper WITH a red ribbon tied around it! THAT is my creative, most amazing, 14-year-old strong, young lady!!
I wrote an essay explaining why I support Tiana in her decision to join this program/school and what I would be able to offer the school.
Tiana then went through an interview process with the teachers and administration. I sat in with her as she answered questions and came up with questions for each one of them. It went perfect and we really had connections with all of the incredible staff.
At first, Tiana was not accepted. They were sad to say, all four spots had been filled and Tiana was the runner up. We left feeling okay with that....thinking we just weren't meant to move to that area.
The email yesterday said that one of the students dropped the program because they were moving out of the area and Tiana now has the option of enrolling in their program!!
We're taking it. This is happening.
What a beautiful school, in a like-minded, small, mountain community....yay! It will not be our old school, or our old community....but, I have a feeling it will be a similar feel.
The boys are on the waiting list. Meanwhile, there is a small public school that will do. They also have a preschool for Keenan.
All of this in a small town....less driving and gas $$. Buses run to both schools, SO much organic around, beautiful people- all encompassing a similar respect for the earth and everything on it, around it, in it....just aware and present.
It feels really good.
Middle and High School years are such important and intense times for everyone. I truly want my girls in a nourishing, strengthening, supportive environment during these years. A sacred place with unlimited growth potential.....we got it. ;)
My boys will be in soon enough. Until then, this ultimate warrior mama is ready for holding it down at home....providing that foundation and support while they journey through their days.
Grateful!!! So, so grateful!! xoxo
Sunday, June 16, 2013
All is Well....Always
Life is such a gift and so amazing.
We are in a safe, nurturing, supportive environment now. We are living in another sanctuary in a different part of the mountains. I still don't know the specifics of how this came to be....it's magic, miracles, blessings and then some. I am just truly grateful.
The kids are happy and so is mama. ;)
The bank did pay us to move. The broker, Phil, was very supportive and loving on the day I met him at the house to do the walk through and recieve the check. He hugged me and told me that I was an amazing mother and he only wished us the best. He let Keenan take some pictures on his camera and was very present during our last interaction. I am so grateful for him. He is an honest, genuine, sweet man involved in a "game" that can be very challenging.
He looked through the apartment, played with the boys, handed me a check from the bank, then gave me $100 cash from his own wallet. I couldn't keep it together....I was crying tears of joy. The hard work, packing, moving, breathing....it was such an amazing process and so rewarding. Phil brought his wife and introduced us. What a challenging, beautiful day.
*exhale
The girls were able to finish school. Yay!
The boys are happy in our new space.....there is a slack line set up, our very own skate park made of wood, and now a place to throw sticks. Sticks is a simple, but very fun way of being a boy or getting out any frustration. ;) We also have a range where we can shoot our bow and arrows.
It came down to the last minute, but worked out as usual. Right before the move, there happened to be a man at the top of my driveway when we returned home one evening. He was there to help my neighbor, and ended up helping us, too.
This beautiful man, earth angel, moved me and the kiddos....just us and him. Moving is usually stressful....there was a little of that. All-in-all, this was the smoothest, most fun, enjoyable move I've ever experienced. He was amazing with my kids....strong, motivated, loving and hilarious. Everything just flowed. We put all of our things in his trailer. It was an epic move.....along with the incrediblly fun pine cone fights and lots of laughter. ;)
We live with a friend I have known for 7ish years and it's just synergistic and perfect for now.
The article? Well....I do know that the article helped some of my friends/family members eat more organic and healthy. I am grateful for that. I truly hope it inspired and helped spark an interest in health, love and happiness for many. What is really important in this lifetime....that is a question for everyone to ask themselves.
Believe, trust, leap....stay honest, keep good intentions, be dependable... and you'll land right where you are supposed to be.
I read something recently....
"God's Will won't take you where God's Will won't protect you."
I believe that. God/Universe/Higher Powers that Be/you fill in the blank. ;)
Love, love......
We are in a safe, nurturing, supportive environment now. We are living in another sanctuary in a different part of the mountains. I still don't know the specifics of how this came to be....it's magic, miracles, blessings and then some. I am just truly grateful.
The kids are happy and so is mama. ;)
The bank did pay us to move. The broker, Phil, was very supportive and loving on the day I met him at the house to do the walk through and recieve the check. He hugged me and told me that I was an amazing mother and he only wished us the best. He let Keenan take some pictures on his camera and was very present during our last interaction. I am so grateful for him. He is an honest, genuine, sweet man involved in a "game" that can be very challenging.
He looked through the apartment, played with the boys, handed me a check from the bank, then gave me $100 cash from his own wallet. I couldn't keep it together....I was crying tears of joy. The hard work, packing, moving, breathing....it was such an amazing process and so rewarding. Phil brought his wife and introduced us. What a challenging, beautiful day.
*exhale
The girls were able to finish school. Yay!
The boys are happy in our new space.....there is a slack line set up, our very own skate park made of wood, and now a place to throw sticks. Sticks is a simple, but very fun way of being a boy or getting out any frustration. ;) We also have a range where we can shoot our bow and arrows.
It came down to the last minute, but worked out as usual. Right before the move, there happened to be a man at the top of my driveway when we returned home one evening. He was there to help my neighbor, and ended up helping us, too.
This beautiful man, earth angel, moved me and the kiddos....just us and him. Moving is usually stressful....there was a little of that. All-in-all, this was the smoothest, most fun, enjoyable move I've ever experienced. He was amazing with my kids....strong, motivated, loving and hilarious. Everything just flowed. We put all of our things in his trailer. It was an epic move.....along with the incrediblly fun pine cone fights and lots of laughter. ;)
We live with a friend I have known for 7ish years and it's just synergistic and perfect for now.
The article? Well....I do know that the article helped some of my friends/family members eat more organic and healthy. I am grateful for that. I truly hope it inspired and helped spark an interest in health, love and happiness for many. What is really important in this lifetime....that is a question for everyone to ask themselves.
Believe, trust, leap....stay honest, keep good intentions, be dependable... and you'll land right where you are supposed to be.
I read something recently....
"God's Will won't take you where God's Will won't protect you."
I believe that. God/Universe/Higher Powers that Be/you fill in the blank. ;)
Love, love......
Thursday, April 18, 2013
My Response (to Boulder Weekly Comments)
We are blessed in so many ways. There are SO many other pertinent things in this world to focus on outside of my family, although we are currently on the front page.
My family has a Source supporting us that is MUCH bigger than the government's funding.
So, to all who believe there isn't an abundance and I am somehow TAKING what is yours, I apologize.
There is more than enough, an abundance even, in this part of the world and I would share with you if there is something I have that you want/need.
I am a firm believer that "everything happens for a reason." This home my family ended up living in that is now foreclosed on, has happened for a reason. Who knows what that happens to be yet, but it wasn't by accident.
The family that lived there and ALLOWED me to move into the garden-level apartment with my family KNEW I was looking for long term. The woman knew me and my background.....she knew me when I was married, knew me throughout some of my pregnancies, knew me when I was going through my divorce, and after. She knew me for about 10 years. Obviously, if she thought I was taking advantage of ALL in the community, she would not have allowed me to move into her home.
She also KNEW she was having marital problems and she knew of her money problems and a few other things. I didn't know this prior to moving in.
Before I moved in, I REITERATED that I was looking for stability. The kids and I had moved enough and we really wanted to stay somewhere LONG TERM.
My biggest concern was that there was six of us living in the apartment below them and I didn't want to disturb them with the noise.
She reassured me all was well and it would work out just fine.
She stopped coming home within THREE weeks of my family moving into the apartment. Obviously, it wasn't something that spontaneously happened and something that she wasn't aware of.
Either way, her "husband" has not left the house. He STILL lives upstairs from me. He was on the DEED of the home and has allowed us to stay. Even if I happened to have found another option for my family, which obviously hasn't happened, the husband STILL lives at the house. I didn't prevent the sale of the house.
I pay the bills, with the help of little child support and my close family and friends. Not an ideal situation and as time passes, change occurs.
I didn't pay rent when I found out NOBODY was paying the MORTGAGE or the bills. This paralleled with my ex not being able to pay consistent child support.
True, my ex has not been paying consistent child support. HE stated that in the article....they called him and spoke directly to him. He is a good man at his core, just going through some hard times financially and has made some choices that we are all enduring the consequences of.
We ALL have made choices we have to live with and consequences that go along with those choices...me included.
I was married for 12 years. I NEVER thought we would divorce. I believed it was forever. For reasons I will not mention, we couldn't compromise and divorced.
Keenan came along because of choices I made and then I was faced with another choice.....abortion (as his father brought up as an option) or have this child. It was an easy choice for me.
My focus.....nourishing these kiddos, our earth and eachother. Nourishing with love, attention, organics, time, nature and truly paying attention and being present.
Organic beans and rice (often)....to organic sushi....wheatgrass, yes. Health is a priority and should be available to ALL.
Employment? Yes, I worked during my marriage and after. I enjoy working. It gets me out of the house, I get to speak with adults, the consistent paycheck is needed, I love helping others, etc.
I have the freedom to choose where to have my children in school or to homeschool them. Everyone has that freedom. Having them in a safe environment that allows growth and supports their very being is of utmost importance to me. I only want them to flourish. I can only work and focus outside of the home when I know my kids are in a safe and supportive environment. Period.
It's a hard balance and the choices are not always easy.
I have a history of homeschooling the children. When I was married, that is the choice we made for our family.
This is a choice that came along after we experienced a severe illness (which also inspired eating organic and being more health conscious) with my oldest daughter, who was not mentioned in this article. This was a decision that was made after dealing with her in the public school system. This was a decision that was LEGAL and an option.
Meet Shaylee....yes, yet ANOTHER father. I gave birth to Shaylee when I was 16. What a blessing. She is currently finishing her junior year in college, double majoring, volunteering her time for a non-profit, holding two jobs and changing the world. She gets all the credit for her accomplishments. She is just an amazing being and came into the world with a purpose that she took hold of at a very young age.
I always tell Shaylee that she's my "soul mate." She has been supportive, loving, critical, challenging and simply incredible.
Shaylee is very close to all of her siblings. Her and I are also very close.
The kids are currently enrolled in Boulder Valley Schools, with the exception of Keenan, for the fall. I'm hoping for the best. This wasn't an easy decision. I was hoping for a Waldorf or Montessori option for all of them, but that has not opened up at this time. Yes, financially that wouldn't add up....but why not go for the best for these kiddos. They are worth every ounce of effort.
We all have childhood stories. Mine is not worse than any other. I was raised by a single mother who worked 60-70 hours a week as a fast food manager.
My dad wasn't present for the majority of my childhood. His wife, my step-mom, hated me and my brother. My father and I are very close now. He has admitted to being absent for most of my childhood and apologized. He is my best friend.
My grandmother remembers coming to my house when I was 2 and my brother 3. She said we were alone and I was on the counter searching for food in the cabinets.
Fast food was our nourishment for the majority of our childhood. I was in the hospital on a regular basis for urinary tract infections, kidney problems and one surgery related to the same.
My mother was/is a pharmaceutical addict. You open her cabinet, and there are many prescription bottles. I remember being given medicine on a regular basis as I was growing up.
We moved, on average, every six months to a year. I went to MANY elementary schools and four high schools.
My social security number was used for bills, as was my brother's.
I remember living in one home, and the cops surrounding the home that only held one TV at the time because we had just began to move in. There was no electricity yet and I was about 12 or 13. They were looking for and took my brother and my mother and left me in the home.
My mom still "functions" and loves me in to the best of her ability. I accept her for who she is and my childhood for what it was.
So, my mom worked....but at what cost. She made money and did HER best, but at what cost? What cost to her children?
It takes parents AND a village to raise children. That is what we have LOST sight of in this society.
There is no perfect parent. There is no perfect person or situation.
My kids know love, they know life, they have seen blessings and magic. They are balanced, present and aware. They are critical thinkers and movers.
They know their mom and I am blessed to truly KNOW them. They are nourished, loved and cared for.
We share ALL of this with everyone we come across.
In spite of sequestration, in spite of any negative energy and comments, in spite of any challenges that we face.....my family is blessed. I am more than grateful.
Love to ALL of you.
Jenae Sigg
Val....you spoke my truth. Thank you so much for your words and support. I can only hope to meet you someday. xo
My family has a Source supporting us that is MUCH bigger than the government's funding.
So, to all who believe there isn't an abundance and I am somehow TAKING what is yours, I apologize.
There is more than enough, an abundance even, in this part of the world and I would share with you if there is something I have that you want/need.
I am a firm believer that "everything happens for a reason." This home my family ended up living in that is now foreclosed on, has happened for a reason. Who knows what that happens to be yet, but it wasn't by accident.
The family that lived there and ALLOWED me to move into the garden-level apartment with my family KNEW I was looking for long term. The woman knew me and my background.....she knew me when I was married, knew me throughout some of my pregnancies, knew me when I was going through my divorce, and after. She knew me for about 10 years. Obviously, if she thought I was taking advantage of ALL in the community, she would not have allowed me to move into her home.
She also KNEW she was having marital problems and she knew of her money problems and a few other things. I didn't know this prior to moving in.
Before I moved in, I REITERATED that I was looking for stability. The kids and I had moved enough and we really wanted to stay somewhere LONG TERM.
My biggest concern was that there was six of us living in the apartment below them and I didn't want to disturb them with the noise.
She reassured me all was well and it would work out just fine.
She stopped coming home within THREE weeks of my family moving into the apartment. Obviously, it wasn't something that spontaneously happened and something that she wasn't aware of.
Either way, her "husband" has not left the house. He STILL lives upstairs from me. He was on the DEED of the home and has allowed us to stay. Even if I happened to have found another option for my family, which obviously hasn't happened, the husband STILL lives at the house. I didn't prevent the sale of the house.
I pay the bills, with the help of little child support and my close family and friends. Not an ideal situation and as time passes, change occurs.
I didn't pay rent when I found out NOBODY was paying the MORTGAGE or the bills. This paralleled with my ex not being able to pay consistent child support.
True, my ex has not been paying consistent child support. HE stated that in the article....they called him and spoke directly to him. He is a good man at his core, just going through some hard times financially and has made some choices that we are all enduring the consequences of.
We ALL have made choices we have to live with and consequences that go along with those choices...me included.
I was married for 12 years. I NEVER thought we would divorce. I believed it was forever. For reasons I will not mention, we couldn't compromise and divorced.
Keenan came along because of choices I made and then I was faced with another choice.....abortion (as his father brought up as an option) or have this child. It was an easy choice for me.
My focus.....nourishing these kiddos, our earth and eachother. Nourishing with love, attention, organics, time, nature and truly paying attention and being present.
Organic beans and rice (often)....to organic sushi....wheatgrass, yes. Health is a priority and should be available to ALL.
Employment? Yes, I worked during my marriage and after. I enjoy working. It gets me out of the house, I get to speak with adults, the consistent paycheck is needed, I love helping others, etc.
I have the freedom to choose where to have my children in school or to homeschool them. Everyone has that freedom. Having them in a safe environment that allows growth and supports their very being is of utmost importance to me. I only want them to flourish. I can only work and focus outside of the home when I know my kids are in a safe and supportive environment. Period.
It's a hard balance and the choices are not always easy.
I have a history of homeschooling the children. When I was married, that is the choice we made for our family.
This is a choice that came along after we experienced a severe illness (which also inspired eating organic and being more health conscious) with my oldest daughter, who was not mentioned in this article. This was a decision that was made after dealing with her in the public school system. This was a decision that was LEGAL and an option.
Meet Shaylee....yes, yet ANOTHER father. I gave birth to Shaylee when I was 16. What a blessing. She is currently finishing her junior year in college, double majoring, volunteering her time for a non-profit, holding two jobs and changing the world. She gets all the credit for her accomplishments. She is just an amazing being and came into the world with a purpose that she took hold of at a very young age.
I always tell Shaylee that she's my "soul mate." She has been supportive, loving, critical, challenging and simply incredible.
Shaylee is very close to all of her siblings. Her and I are also very close.
The kids are currently enrolled in Boulder Valley Schools, with the exception of Keenan, for the fall. I'm hoping for the best. This wasn't an easy decision. I was hoping for a Waldorf or Montessori option for all of them, but that has not opened up at this time. Yes, financially that wouldn't add up....but why not go for the best for these kiddos. They are worth every ounce of effort.
We all have childhood stories. Mine is not worse than any other. I was raised by a single mother who worked 60-70 hours a week as a fast food manager.
My dad wasn't present for the majority of my childhood. His wife, my step-mom, hated me and my brother. My father and I are very close now. He has admitted to being absent for most of my childhood and apologized. He is my best friend.
My grandmother remembers coming to my house when I was 2 and my brother 3. She said we were alone and I was on the counter searching for food in the cabinets.
Fast food was our nourishment for the majority of our childhood. I was in the hospital on a regular basis for urinary tract infections, kidney problems and one surgery related to the same.
My mother was/is a pharmaceutical addict. You open her cabinet, and there are many prescription bottles. I remember being given medicine on a regular basis as I was growing up.
We moved, on average, every six months to a year. I went to MANY elementary schools and four high schools.
My social security number was used for bills, as was my brother's.
I remember living in one home, and the cops surrounding the home that only held one TV at the time because we had just began to move in. There was no electricity yet and I was about 12 or 13. They were looking for and took my brother and my mother and left me in the home.
My mom still "functions" and loves me in to the best of her ability. I accept her for who she is and my childhood for what it was.
So, my mom worked....but at what cost. She made money and did HER best, but at what cost? What cost to her children?
It takes parents AND a village to raise children. That is what we have LOST sight of in this society.
There is no perfect parent. There is no perfect person or situation.
My kids know love, they know life, they have seen blessings and magic. They are balanced, present and aware. They are critical thinkers and movers.
They know their mom and I am blessed to truly KNOW them. They are nourished, loved and cared for.
We share ALL of this with everyone we come across.
In spite of sequestration, in spite of any negative energy and comments, in spite of any challenges that we face.....my family is blessed. I am more than grateful.
Love to ALL of you.
Jenae Sigg
Val....you spoke my truth. Thank you so much for your words and support. I can only hope to meet you someday. xo
Friday, April 12, 2013
Stirring it Up!
Wow....a girlfriend of mine was looking for a face to put to her story in the Boulder Weekly. The subject is Sequestration. She asked if it would be okay to have my family be that "face."
Here is the story....
http://www.boulderweekly.com/article-10928-searching-for-a-road-home.html
It's a true story....sad, beautiful, heavy, and real. It has really riled up some opinions in Boulder! Some are pretty harsh. I'm okay with that, though.
I know what kind of mama I am and what kind of person I am. I contribute to this world in many ways and I know my worth.
It's always EASY to judge and those who "know it all" have so many limitations.
Life is amazing and in all of these challenges are SO many blessings.
We were asked what the ONE thing is that we would want people to know about our family....
Tiana (13) said it perfectly....We are happy. We don't want sympathy because our family is truly happy and love is abundant and flows freely.
Can't BUY that! ;)
Here is the story....
http://www.boulderweekly.com/article-10928-searching-for-a-road-home.html
It's a true story....sad, beautiful, heavy, and real. It has really riled up some opinions in Boulder! Some are pretty harsh. I'm okay with that, though.
I know what kind of mama I am and what kind of person I am. I contribute to this world in many ways and I know my worth.
It's always EASY to judge and those who "know it all" have so many limitations.
Life is amazing and in all of these challenges are SO many blessings.
We were asked what the ONE thing is that we would want people to know about our family....
Tiana (13) said it perfectly....We are happy. We don't want sympathy because our family is truly happy and love is abundant and flows freely.
Can't BUY that! ;)
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
I Have Rights! Staying Put!
Just read up on my rights in this foreclosure process...
Renters in Foreclosed Properties No Longer Lose Their Leases
Before President Obama signed the "Protecting Tenants at Foreclosure Act of 2009," most renters lost their leases upon foreclosure. But this legislation provided that leases would survive a foreclosure. The tenant could stay at least until the end of the lease, and month-to-month tenants would be entitled to 90 days' notice before having to move out (this notice period is longer than any state's non-foreclosure notice period, a real boon to tenants).
I have a month-to-month lease!! If I calculated correctly and this information is legit...I will have until July 8th to stay where we're at!! Yay!!
Of course, I will keep my eyes open and continue to work towards a stable, amazing environment for this family.
*exhale* Yay! So grateful!! xoxo
Roots From Germany!!
I was at my father's house after an Easter family gathering at my aunt's....not that I personally celebrate Easter, but family is good anytime of the year.
My dad showed me a family tree, lineage report that had been put together by some of my ancestors. It was amazing!!
My great-grandfather, Julius, and his brother, George, came over to the states from Jestetten, Baden, Germany in 1904. Jestetten sits very close to Switzerland. Switzerland surrounds it from three sides.
My great uncle, George, came to Colorado. He was only 17! My grandparents, from that side, still reside in Colorado today.
What an amazing read! I couldn't put it down. I have asked for a copy and my dad's going to get that for me. It's such an incredible thing to find out part of my heritage.
There was quite a bit of war and sadness in the stories that lead me back to my roots. I'm sure that may be the case in many people's history and ancestry. Sad....but true.
Makes me even MORE grateful for my life and everything in it.
I want to visit Jestetten at some point. It would be such a treat.
Germany....you ready for me!? ;)
My dad showed me a family tree, lineage report that had been put together by some of my ancestors. It was amazing!!
My great-grandfather, Julius, and his brother, George, came over to the states from Jestetten, Baden, Germany in 1904. Jestetten sits very close to Switzerland. Switzerland surrounds it from three sides.
My great uncle, George, came to Colorado. He was only 17! My grandparents, from that side, still reside in Colorado today.
What an amazing read! I couldn't put it down. I have asked for a copy and my dad's going to get that for me. It's such an incredible thing to find out part of my heritage.
There was quite a bit of war and sadness in the stories that lead me back to my roots. I'm sure that may be the case in many people's history and ancestry. Sad....but true.
Makes me even MORE grateful for my life and everything in it.
I want to visit Jestetten at some point. It would be such a treat.
Germany....you ready for me!? ;)
Monday, April 1, 2013
Counting Blessings
Sometimes I forget how many amazing things have happened throughout my life. Reading back through my journals, remembering moments, realizing blessings are abundant!
We're still in the house. I haven't made a decision on the relocation offer. I'm just flowing with it. I have been on-line daily looking for other options and haven't found anything yet. I suppose the right door just hasn't opened yet. Timing is always perfect, so I'm throwing away my cares and keeping my eyes and ears open.
My kids are so beautiful and they remind me by their actions, words and strength how magical the world can be.
Breathin, believin and lovin....freedom. *exhale* xo
We're still in the house. I haven't made a decision on the relocation offer. I'm just flowing with it. I have been on-line daily looking for other options and haven't found anything yet. I suppose the right door just hasn't opened yet. Timing is always perfect, so I'm throwing away my cares and keeping my eyes and ears open.
My kids are so beautiful and they remind me by their actions, words and strength how magical the world can be.
Breathin, believin and lovin....freedom. *exhale* xo
Friday, March 29, 2013
Feeling Like Staying Put
I received a hand delivered letter yesterday from the real estate agent that is heading up our eviction. It is a relocation assistance offer....
The bank will pay me $1700 if I move us out by the sixth of April.....really? Move this family in seven days? That $1700 will go fast and then where will we be? That's your offer?
$900 if I move us out by the 22nd of April.
The girls only have two months left of school....eight weeks. They catch the bus every morning about five blocks from the house.
Let's see....$1700.... ideally, first months rent and deposit for a place to live, moving costs, gas to drive my girls to their bus stop every day if I cannot locate a home in their current school district. Still no child support. A job? Have one....raising my five beautiful kiddos. There is no paycheck, no cash income for that though. If I had a safe place for them all, I would work. I worked during my entire marriage and enjoyed it.
I do have one back up plan....a friend has a two bedroom, garden level apartment in his home. He is trying to fix up and sell the house. It has no well water or city water. He trucks in water and dumps it into a cistern that feeds the house. It would be like camping....not able to take long showers and use tons of water. He called it GI Joe style living. I wouldn't be able to unpack our things, as it would only be a temporary solution. It is down the mountain, farther from my girls school.
Really surrendering at this point. Trying to stay grounded and make the right choices for this amazing family. I knew this day was coming, but never saw another option. I know, in my core, it is all going to work out beautifully. I just have to remind myself of that and keep my head up.
Things to be grateful for....beautiful, healthy kiddos, our time in this amazing sanctuary, organic food at the food banks, an incredible older daughter that is rocking at this thing called life, friends, family and community. So many earth angels and blessings along the way, too.
Not thinking we'll move with that offer. It's more than I have now, but it will go fast. Thinking it over....
Wednesday, March 13, 2013
Dearest Fannie Mae Mortgage Company....
You wouldn't know me by name or story. I am just another "case" of foreclosure.... another number. A tenant that has fallen into a situation that unknowingly would cause more instability, when stability was the #1 goal. A family that is being forced to move to an unknown destination.
Yes, I knew this was happening. It was a little late in the game when I found out, but I knew the foreclosure was in process. I have been diligently searching for another opportunity...another rental that would allow a single mother of five (six including my amazing, beautiful girl in college now) to call home. A home we can retreat to that is sacred and special. A place we can finally come home to and KNOW it won't be taken from us....we won't be evicted due to non-payment, we won't have to leave due to foreclosure, we won't have to worry about leaving due to our size or noise level. There won't be some unstable man living upstairs from us. It will be our stable, sanctuary where we can plant roots. A place when the children can grow, be safe, and always know it's their's.
Hard to do when child support is "every now and then." Hard to do when my passion and love in life is raising these beautiful beings, guiding them, nourishing them, feeding their souls as they grow...being a true mother. Hard to balance in this world.
Fine...challenge....I've had my share. I also realize MANY have it much worse than we do. My problems are "first world" in comparison.
I can't give up....not never. ;) Consider me the "Ultimate Mama Warrior."
I can work 60 hours a week and let others raise them? Not for me or this crew. Notice the rest of society? Notice the lack of love, parenting, time, guidance, attention, and focus on our families in this society? What is important....really? Life is but a blink in time...what is important?
Here's the deal, Fannie.... this family has been homeless on three separate occasions now. We have camped it, lived in emergency family housing, stayed with family and friends (for a night at a time, due to our large size), and have had more than our share of days on beans and rice.
These kiddos have seen/felt/experienced alcoholism, have been in unacceptable situations (that have only made them stronger), have had to use critical thinking (thank you, they now are experts), and have learned patience, gained wisdom, struggled with balance, trust and stability. We are learning, growing and challenged with contrast and expansion on a regular basis.
Grateful in so many ways..... but this is no longer acceptable.
Fannie, you own MANY properties....you really need this one? Evicting a single mama of five to gain profit? Not working with my lease because it is a month-to-month....but if it happened to be a year lease, I could have more time?
Maybe you can help me explain to my girls that we have to move before school is over. Two months til school is out and because we don't have a year lease, we have 30 days to move.
Fannie, we just found this school. The old school in the canyon that the girls have been attending for 3 years closed this past year for financial reasons....they lost their only stability besides me. Can't we just finish the school year?
Rules, laws, regulations, guidelines.....you don't know our family? You don't care? There is no room for human"ness?" WHY?
Tiana is 13 now and amazing! She just finished volleyball and had a great season. She has a band performance tomorrow night and will be playing drums.
Jayden? She is 11....almost 12 now. She has a choir performance tonight. She is really excited to sing on stage and will be in her element. This has been a tough year for her. Emotions have ran high....entering a public school for the first time, dealing with her feelings about her father being absent, having a stable home environment. This one is my most sensitive.
Isaiah...he's 9 now. He LOVES skateboarding and is smart as a whip! He has great energy and is fun to be around....quite the character. He has a hard time relating to men in his life. He seems to withdraw when they are around.
Malik is my amazing, energetic, fireball. He is definitely a mountain man and enjoys the outdoors. He also LOVES skateboarding. His challenges are mostly with speech.
Keenan....my little man. This little guy is almost four and my most stubborn. ;) It will serve him as he gets older, I'm sure. What a strength in my life.
Fannie, this is my incredible crew. This is the family that will be moving soon and leaving their only sanctuary. We are always taken care of and I know this will be no different...somehow it ALWAYS works out beautifully.
Just know, this mama is tired. I don't want to move. I don't want these children to have to move AGAIN. These beautiful souls deserve, crave and would thrive with stability.
I know you are hoping for more money, but don't forget the families that are affected....the children that suffer....the parents guilt from the weight of it all. There is room for human"ness" in all of this. Maybe an addendum needs to be created. ;)
Yes, I knew this was happening. It was a little late in the game when I found out, but I knew the foreclosure was in process. I have been diligently searching for another opportunity...another rental that would allow a single mother of five (six including my amazing, beautiful girl in college now) to call home. A home we can retreat to that is sacred and special. A place we can finally come home to and KNOW it won't be taken from us....we won't be evicted due to non-payment, we won't have to leave due to foreclosure, we won't have to worry about leaving due to our size or noise level. There won't be some unstable man living upstairs from us. It will be our stable, sanctuary where we can plant roots. A place when the children can grow, be safe, and always know it's their's.
Hard to do when child support is "every now and then." Hard to do when my passion and love in life is raising these beautiful beings, guiding them, nourishing them, feeding their souls as they grow...being a true mother. Hard to balance in this world.
Fine...challenge....I've had my share. I also realize MANY have it much worse than we do. My problems are "first world" in comparison.
I can't give up....not never. ;) Consider me the "Ultimate Mama Warrior."
I can work 60 hours a week and let others raise them? Not for me or this crew. Notice the rest of society? Notice the lack of love, parenting, time, guidance, attention, and focus on our families in this society? What is important....really? Life is but a blink in time...what is important?
Here's the deal, Fannie.... this family has been homeless on three separate occasions now. We have camped it, lived in emergency family housing, stayed with family and friends (for a night at a time, due to our large size), and have had more than our share of days on beans and rice.
These kiddos have seen/felt/experienced alcoholism, have been in unacceptable situations (that have only made them stronger), have had to use critical thinking (thank you, they now are experts), and have learned patience, gained wisdom, struggled with balance, trust and stability. We are learning, growing and challenged with contrast and expansion on a regular basis.
Grateful in so many ways..... but this is no longer acceptable.
Fannie, you own MANY properties....you really need this one? Evicting a single mama of five to gain profit? Not working with my lease because it is a month-to-month....but if it happened to be a year lease, I could have more time?
Maybe you can help me explain to my girls that we have to move before school is over. Two months til school is out and because we don't have a year lease, we have 30 days to move.
Fannie, we just found this school. The old school in the canyon that the girls have been attending for 3 years closed this past year for financial reasons....they lost their only stability besides me. Can't we just finish the school year?
Rules, laws, regulations, guidelines.....you don't know our family? You don't care? There is no room for human"ness?" WHY?
Tiana is 13 now and amazing! She just finished volleyball and had a great season. She has a band performance tomorrow night and will be playing drums.
Jayden? She is 11....almost 12 now. She has a choir performance tonight. She is really excited to sing on stage and will be in her element. This has been a tough year for her. Emotions have ran high....entering a public school for the first time, dealing with her feelings about her father being absent, having a stable home environment. This one is my most sensitive.
Isaiah...he's 9 now. He LOVES skateboarding and is smart as a whip! He has great energy and is fun to be around....quite the character. He has a hard time relating to men in his life. He seems to withdraw when they are around.
Malik is my amazing, energetic, fireball. He is definitely a mountain man and enjoys the outdoors. He also LOVES skateboarding. His challenges are mostly with speech.
Keenan....my little man. This little guy is almost four and my most stubborn. ;) It will serve him as he gets older, I'm sure. What a strength in my life.
Fannie, this is my incredible crew. This is the family that will be moving soon and leaving their only sanctuary. We are always taken care of and I know this will be no different...somehow it ALWAYS works out beautifully.
Just know, this mama is tired. I don't want to move. I don't want these children to have to move AGAIN. These beautiful souls deserve, crave and would thrive with stability.
I know you are hoping for more money, but don't forget the families that are affected....the children that suffer....the parents guilt from the weight of it all. There is room for human"ness" in all of this. Maybe an addendum needs to be created. ;)
Thursday, February 28, 2013
A Week Before the Auction
One week until the home we are currently in is up for auction. My plan? ;) I've been looking, but haven't come upon any opportunities for housing. No worries...apparently we are right where we are supposed to be.
Of course, the kids and I are using this opportunity to see what a foreclosure auction is like. A homeschool trip to the county next week! I've never been, nobody I know has ever been....why not check it out and learn a little something? I don't expect anything specific to happen, just feel like we should go.
The girls are doing well in school and the boys are keeping me busy and on my toes daily while we spend our days together exploring this world of ours. They are curious and full of energy. Malik (6) has been super interested in reading and sounds. He's motivated. We have been playing a LOT of games at home, Connect 4, Life, Uno, etc. All the boys are loving it....me, too! The girls come home and join in as they tell us about their days, their connections, concerns, ideas.
When I moved into this home, my garden level apartment in this big, beautiful mountain home, I was for sure it would be long term. It certainly feels like home to me....my sanctuary. Maybe it will be? Who knows.
Three weeks after I moved in, in June, the wife (that was living upstairs with the husband) left the husband (landlord drama) to move in with her new man and they both stopped paying the mortgage and bills. Blessings in it all though..... I haven't paid rent since August, just paying the bills. That has been perfect for us. My ex has been paying less than and little to no child support these past six months or so. My income? That is my income. Good timing Universe. I am grateful. Thankful for friends, family and earth angels for loving this family and taking better than good care of us.
I would love to work if I could get these boys in an environment that would allow them to grow spiritually, mentally... exponentially! I want to be a mama first, then work part time outside of the family serving amazing, organic food, juice, love to all. That would be my perfect world. We'll see....I have some ideas that I want to focus on and bring to life. Soon! Soon....did ya hear that, Universe?! Please and thank you. xo
Of course, the kids and I are using this opportunity to see what a foreclosure auction is like. A homeschool trip to the county next week! I've never been, nobody I know has ever been....why not check it out and learn a little something? I don't expect anything specific to happen, just feel like we should go.
The girls are doing well in school and the boys are keeping me busy and on my toes daily while we spend our days together exploring this world of ours. They are curious and full of energy. Malik (6) has been super interested in reading and sounds. He's motivated. We have been playing a LOT of games at home, Connect 4, Life, Uno, etc. All the boys are loving it....me, too! The girls come home and join in as they tell us about their days, their connections, concerns, ideas.
When I moved into this home, my garden level apartment in this big, beautiful mountain home, I was for sure it would be long term. It certainly feels like home to me....my sanctuary. Maybe it will be? Who knows.
Three weeks after I moved in, in June, the wife (that was living upstairs with the husband) left the husband (landlord drama) to move in with her new man and they both stopped paying the mortgage and bills. Blessings in it all though..... I haven't paid rent since August, just paying the bills. That has been perfect for us. My ex has been paying less than and little to no child support these past six months or so. My income? That is my income. Good timing Universe. I am grateful. Thankful for friends, family and earth angels for loving this family and taking better than good care of us.
I would love to work if I could get these boys in an environment that would allow them to grow spiritually, mentally... exponentially! I want to be a mama first, then work part time outside of the family serving amazing, organic food, juice, love to all. That would be my perfect world. We'll see....I have some ideas that I want to focus on and bring to life. Soon! Soon....did ya hear that, Universe?! Please and thank you. xo
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Still Lovely and Blessings Abundant!
Life continues to be a beautiful, chaotic, interesting, amazing, magical, and a lesson filled journey.
I continue to search for Truth.... continue loving and supporting these babies.... continue giving love freely to all who are in my "bubble" ....continue staying open and believing in something Bigger than me that shows me daily how much I am loved and taken care of.
We're still in the mountains, living in an amazing sanctuary right now. I have a story to go with that.... but maybe another time. ;) It's another "blessing in disguise." The home is in foreclosure and we may have to move after or around the auction date which is in March of 2013. Good news: I am not paying rent...only bills. Thankful for that. Who knows, maybe someone will purchase it and let us stay in the garden level apartment....maybe I'll meet a man who finds it just as amazing as I do, who falls in love with it and buys it! I'm such a dreamer, such an optimistic girl.
My ex moved to Portland with his girlfriend/fiance in September of this year. Since then, child support has been a hit and run. Right now, he is unemployed....but, we are still more than taken care of. Friends, family, earth angels, unearthly angels, ;) and higher powers at work for sure.
The three boys are at home with me.... Isaiah (9), Malik (6), Keenan (3.5). The girls are in a small school that will do for now. Their old school closed due to financial reasons.... well, I think the truth is the new administrator was hungry for more money. She closed the mountain campus and opened a HUGE new one down in the flats. I am searching for another school that is a similar sanctuary for this crew. It's coming.... maybe now is just a good time to keep the boys home. The girls are happy where they are. That's all that truly matters.
My life is full of reading spiritual books right now. I just picked up The Urantia Book. The way I found it was incredible! I found it at a thrift store for $1.50 directly after searching for it at the local library and coming up with nothing. It's a book that I've been thinking about since I read a book about angels a few months ago. The book of angels mentioned The Urantia Book. It's a BIG book and not an easy read. I'm exploring it right now. We'll see. I'm really excited about it and it sure feels good.
Maybe I'll make it to a computer more often. I journal almost daily at home....but I do miss blogging.
My priorities consist of love, love, love and love. Loving life, my family, friends, strangers, this earth we call home and everything on it. Other than that....Truth, fogiveness, gratitude.....hmmmm.
Thought for the evening.....
Our life is just a blink in the big scheme of things. Why are we here? To become educated, make money, buy the newest IPhone, stay in our crazy schedules and not take any of it with us after we blink? And what then, do we leave behind?
What about breathing, taking care of our Home, loving, being together, nurturing eachother, staying non-judgemental.....staying out of Man's mind, staying away from Man's ideas, schedules, and ways of life that have truly brought devastation to all living things? Why do we do what we do and STILL feel empty at the end of the day?
Time for change.
I continue to search for Truth.... continue loving and supporting these babies.... continue giving love freely to all who are in my "bubble" ....continue staying open and believing in something Bigger than me that shows me daily how much I am loved and taken care of.
We're still in the mountains, living in an amazing sanctuary right now. I have a story to go with that.... but maybe another time. ;) It's another "blessing in disguise." The home is in foreclosure and we may have to move after or around the auction date which is in March of 2013. Good news: I am not paying rent...only bills. Thankful for that. Who knows, maybe someone will purchase it and let us stay in the garden level apartment....maybe I'll meet a man who finds it just as amazing as I do, who falls in love with it and buys it! I'm such a dreamer, such an optimistic girl.
My ex moved to Portland with his girlfriend/fiance in September of this year. Since then, child support has been a hit and run. Right now, he is unemployed....but, we are still more than taken care of. Friends, family, earth angels, unearthly angels, ;) and higher powers at work for sure.
The three boys are at home with me.... Isaiah (9), Malik (6), Keenan (3.5). The girls are in a small school that will do for now. Their old school closed due to financial reasons.... well, I think the truth is the new administrator was hungry for more money. She closed the mountain campus and opened a HUGE new one down in the flats. I am searching for another school that is a similar sanctuary for this crew. It's coming.... maybe now is just a good time to keep the boys home. The girls are happy where they are. That's all that truly matters.
My life is full of reading spiritual books right now. I just picked up The Urantia Book. The way I found it was incredible! I found it at a thrift store for $1.50 directly after searching for it at the local library and coming up with nothing. It's a book that I've been thinking about since I read a book about angels a few months ago. The book of angels mentioned The Urantia Book. It's a BIG book and not an easy read. I'm exploring it right now. We'll see. I'm really excited about it and it sure feels good.
Maybe I'll make it to a computer more often. I journal almost daily at home....but I do miss blogging.
My priorities consist of love, love, love and love. Loving life, my family, friends, strangers, this earth we call home and everything on it. Other than that....Truth, fogiveness, gratitude.....hmmmm.
Thought for the evening.....
Our life is just a blink in the big scheme of things. Why are we here? To become educated, make money, buy the newest IPhone, stay in our crazy schedules and not take any of it with us after we blink? And what then, do we leave behind?
What about breathing, taking care of our Home, loving, being together, nurturing eachother, staying non-judgemental.....staying out of Man's mind, staying away from Man's ideas, schedules, and ways of life that have truly brought devastation to all living things? Why do we do what we do and STILL feel empty at the end of the day?
Time for change.
Wednesday, December 21, 2011
The Dream... The Change After 7 Years
I had a dream about cutting my hair. I know, sounds hippie. 
The next morning I shared my dream with the kids and Isaiah (8) started crying. They have only known me with dreadies... I had them for seven years. It was a big deal especially for Isaiah because he and Malik have them, too. I told him not to worry, that it was just a dream and I hadn't made any decisions.
A week after that, I was headed to Boulder after dropping the three older kids off at school and Malik (4) asked if we could go to Ned instead. So, I turned around and went up the hill to Nederland instead of down to Boulder.
The two babies and I were messing around, window shopping in Ned and came across a barber shop. We were just wasting time, waiting for the other three to get out of school. I peeked in the window of the shop and it was old school. It was very funky and cool. The boys and I started walking away and the barber stuck his head out of the door and asked if we wanted to come in and look around...so we did. The man had art work in the back of the shop that was just beautiful. He wasn't the artist, it was one of his friends. We just started chatting. I still wasn't thinking about getting my hair cut.
Then this big, shaggy mountain man came in and asked if Jaymei would clean him up and send him out into the real world... so I watched as he did. It was an amazing transformation! I suddenly felt like it was the right timing and the right man to cut my dreadies. I called Isaiah at school and told him where I was and who I had met. I asked him if he thought it would be okay if I cut my hair. He said, "Go for it, Mom!"
I LOVED the feeling of the brush against my scalp and getting my head massaged with shampoo...yes, fingers through my hair for the first time in seven years was more than nice! It was just incredible! My head felt so much lighter and maybe I was feeling a little rebellious and sassy after it was over. It was such an amazing, beautiful, lovely, freeing and just overall phenomenal experience to get my dreadies cut.
The next morning I shared my dream with the kids and Isaiah (8) started crying. They have only known me with dreadies... I had them for seven years. It was a big deal especially for Isaiah because he and Malik have them, too. I told him not to worry, that it was just a dream and I hadn't made any decisions.A week after that, I was headed to Boulder after dropping the three older kids off at school and Malik (4) asked if we could go to Ned instead. So, I turned around and went up the hill to Nederland instead of down to Boulder.
The two babies and I were messing around, window shopping in Ned and came across a barber shop. We were just wasting time, waiting for the other three to get out of school. I peeked in the window of the shop and it was old school. It was very funky and cool. The boys and I started walking away and the barber stuck his head out of the door and asked if we wanted to come in and look around...so we did. The man had art work in the back of the shop that was just beautiful. He wasn't the artist, it was one of his friends. We just started chatting. I still wasn't thinking about getting my hair cut.
Then this big, shaggy mountain man came in and asked if Jaymei would clean him up and send him out into the real world... so I watched as he did. It was an amazing transformation! I suddenly felt like it was the right timing and the right man to cut my dreadies. I called Isaiah at school and told him where I was and who I had met. I asked him if he thought it would be okay if I cut my hair. He said, "Go for it, Mom!"
I LOVED the feeling of the brush against my scalp and getting my head massaged with shampoo...yes, fingers through my hair for the first time in seven years was more than nice! It was just incredible! My head felt so much lighter and maybe I was feeling a little rebellious and sassy after it was over.
It was such an amazing, beautiful, lovely, freeing and just overall phenomenal experience to get my dreadies cut.
Monday, December 5, 2011
Police, Firemen, and Flashing Lights At My Apartment...
I was at work about a week before Thanksgiving, when I got a call from Tiana (12). I had just clocked out for lunch. She sounded a bit unsettled as she told me Malik was bleeding all over the place. I was calm because Malik is all boy. This would not be the last time Malik was bleeding or hurting. Out of all of my children, Malik (4) is one who will push the limits and test his boundaries often. ;)
Tiana continued to tell me he was bleeding all over the bathroom. He had a bloody nose from accidently head butting his two-year-old brother.
I tried to comfort her and have do some deep breathing. I advised her I would find someone to come check on them. I found a friend that was willing to take my car and go check on the kids. My home is about 25 minutes from my work.
I clocked back in from lunch and called Tiana to let her know I had found someone to come check on them. She said not to worry because she went upstairs to get the neighbors (which I had advised them to do in an emergency) and they came down and decided to call the paramedics.
Paramedics! Now, I was the one doing the deep breathing. I called my friend to bring my car back so I could go to my apartment to meet the paramedics and check on the kiddos.
Tiana had told me on my ride out that Malik was fine, it was just a bloody nose and they got it to stop.
My friend drove as I sat in the passenger seat going over different scenarios. What could I do? My apartment had no furniture, we were sleeping on the floor. We had clothes around the perimeters of the bedrooms because we had no dressers or hangers. I did have food in the fridge and pantry and the kids were warm and clothed. I was at work, while my five were home alone. I wondered what type of trouble I would be in?
As I sit in my car, heading to my apartment, I finally just gave it up to the Universe and higher powers. I have been doing all I can do. Everything has been a process and continues to be. The daycare situation was my next focus. I just haven't completed that process.... I am in the middle of it.
So, whatever was going to happen, I surrendered. I can handle whatever is next.
I got to the apartment and ran up to have four firemen and one police officer greet me at the top of my stairs. They were very kind and told me Malik was fine, there was no need to run. I knew that but needed to touch base with my crew. I politely asked if I could run into the apartment and check on my kiddos. They allowed me to do that.
I went inside to touch base with each of them... hugs, smiles, love, sweetness and I felt a sense of calm in the aparment. Not sure if being together caused that feeling or if it was present between my kiddos before I showed up. Either way, it felt really good to be together.
The firemen and police officer followed me into the apartment and requested that I step outside with them for a minute.
Uh-oh... deep breath. Okay, I am ready...
I went out front and the firemen went on about how amazing my kiddos were. They were very impressed by their actions and how calm they were. They went on to say they noticed we didn't have any furniture in the apartment. I nodded. I just haven't been able to get any furniture, don't have a truck to move it, nor would I have the man power to bring it up to my apartment. I didn't tell them that, that is what I was thinking. They said that one of the firemen had an extra queen bed, another had a dresser, another had a twin bed, and on and on. They asked if I would allow them to bring furniture to my apartment. !!??
What? You want to furnish my apartment? Wow! It took me a minute, but I gratefully accepted and teared up. I couldn't believe it... these sweet people were going to bring us beds! They were supporting me and helping the family.
The police officer was next and agreed that the children were just incredible. He said it must be hard being a single mom of five. He gave me some resources and said his department was right around the corner if we needed anything.
After our run in with the Sheriff's office in Fairplay, this was SO incredible! The kiddos now have a different perspective on law enforcement. What a beautiful thing.
The Saturday prior to Thanksgiving, eight firemen came to the apartment and loaded it with furniture... beds, recliners, an entertainment center, etc. The next day, Mike, the fireman that started this came by with his wife. They brought new dish towels, new washclothes, a new, beautiful vacuum, brand new bedding and pillows for each bed, $100 in cash and $100 in a King Soopers gift card.
We are blessed. I am so grateful. I'm not sure "grateful" even begins to describe the appreciation I'm feeling. Just having beds, towels, a vacuum, etc. helps our day-to-day family life. Somehow life is easier. It helps me be a better mom and helps the kids get through their days and nights. We are all sleeping better in beds, enjoying the recliners, loving the kitchen towels and cleaning supplies. The apartment just feels homey.
I have been praying for some type of help. Just needed that boost... who knew it would come in this package. The bloody nose that brought assistance... ;)
Tiana continued to tell me he was bleeding all over the bathroom. He had a bloody nose from accidently head butting his two-year-old brother.
I tried to comfort her and have do some deep breathing. I advised her I would find someone to come check on them. I found a friend that was willing to take my car and go check on the kids. My home is about 25 minutes from my work.
I clocked back in from lunch and called Tiana to let her know I had found someone to come check on them. She said not to worry because she went upstairs to get the neighbors (which I had advised them to do in an emergency) and they came down and decided to call the paramedics.
Paramedics! Now, I was the one doing the deep breathing. I called my friend to bring my car back so I could go to my apartment to meet the paramedics and check on the kiddos.
Tiana had told me on my ride out that Malik was fine, it was just a bloody nose and they got it to stop.
My friend drove as I sat in the passenger seat going over different scenarios. What could I do? My apartment had no furniture, we were sleeping on the floor. We had clothes around the perimeters of the bedrooms because we had no dressers or hangers. I did have food in the fridge and pantry and the kids were warm and clothed. I was at work, while my five were home alone. I wondered what type of trouble I would be in?
As I sit in my car, heading to my apartment, I finally just gave it up to the Universe and higher powers. I have been doing all I can do. Everything has been a process and continues to be. The daycare situation was my next focus. I just haven't completed that process.... I am in the middle of it.
So, whatever was going to happen, I surrendered. I can handle whatever is next.
I got to the apartment and ran up to have four firemen and one police officer greet me at the top of my stairs. They were very kind and told me Malik was fine, there was no need to run. I knew that but needed to touch base with my crew. I politely asked if I could run into the apartment and check on my kiddos. They allowed me to do that.
I went inside to touch base with each of them... hugs, smiles, love, sweetness and I felt a sense of calm in the aparment. Not sure if being together caused that feeling or if it was present between my kiddos before I showed up. Either way, it felt really good to be together.
The firemen and police officer followed me into the apartment and requested that I step outside with them for a minute.
Uh-oh... deep breath. Okay, I am ready...
I went out front and the firemen went on about how amazing my kiddos were. They were very impressed by their actions and how calm they were. They went on to say they noticed we didn't have any furniture in the apartment. I nodded. I just haven't been able to get any furniture, don't have a truck to move it, nor would I have the man power to bring it up to my apartment. I didn't tell them that, that is what I was thinking. They said that one of the firemen had an extra queen bed, another had a dresser, another had a twin bed, and on and on. They asked if I would allow them to bring furniture to my apartment. !!??
What? You want to furnish my apartment? Wow! It took me a minute, but I gratefully accepted and teared up. I couldn't believe it... these sweet people were going to bring us beds! They were supporting me and helping the family.
The police officer was next and agreed that the children were just incredible. He said it must be hard being a single mom of five. He gave me some resources and said his department was right around the corner if we needed anything.
After our run in with the Sheriff's office in Fairplay, this was SO incredible! The kiddos now have a different perspective on law enforcement. What a beautiful thing.
The Saturday prior to Thanksgiving, eight firemen came to the apartment and loaded it with furniture... beds, recliners, an entertainment center, etc. The next day, Mike, the fireman that started this came by with his wife. They brought new dish towels, new washclothes, a new, beautiful vacuum, brand new bedding and pillows for each bed, $100 in cash and $100 in a King Soopers gift card.
We are blessed. I am so grateful. I'm not sure "grateful" even begins to describe the appreciation I'm feeling. Just having beds, towels, a vacuum, etc. helps our day-to-day family life. Somehow life is easier. It helps me be a better mom and helps the kids get through their days and nights. We are all sleeping better in beds, enjoying the recliners, loving the kitchen towels and cleaning supplies. The apartment just feels homey.
I have been praying for some type of help. Just needed that boost... who knew it would come in this package. The bloody nose that brought assistance... ;)
Monday, November 28, 2011
Goals... A Job, Check... An Apt., Check...
I have a full time job that I love, an apartment that I am grateful for, and such a beautiful crew.
I always have an abundance of energy. I can function, with clarity, on little sleep. Although, my new schedule is testing me. ;) I work from 2-11pm about 5 days a week. I get home at about 11:30 and end up cleaning the apartment and taking the dogs out. I usually get to bed around 12:30 or 1 in the morning only to wake up at 6 and get the kiddos fed, dressed, and ready for school. We pack lunches and try to clean up before we leave. Their school is a good 45 min to an hour away from our apartment.
I know I could take them to the nearest public school, but that doesn't feel good to me. We have a community at their school in the mountains. The kids have learned to knit, to garden , to play violin, and have freedom to make choices. I am grateful they are, and have been, at this school we love and cherish.
Right now I have to pick them up early so I can make it to work on time. The older ones watch my younger ones while I am working. Not ideal, but needed for now. They are bummed about it and want me to get situated so they can stay all week, for full school days. I am working on getting daycare set up... that is my next goal.
Life is getting settled and I am grateful for the stability.... a little tired, but I got this. I know we are a strong enough family unit to attain that next goal... and the next, and the next. ;)
I always have an abundance of energy. I can function, with clarity, on little sleep. Although, my new schedule is testing me. ;) I work from 2-11pm about 5 days a week. I get home at about 11:30 and end up cleaning the apartment and taking the dogs out. I usually get to bed around 12:30 or 1 in the morning only to wake up at 6 and get the kiddos fed, dressed, and ready for school. We pack lunches and try to clean up before we leave. Their school is a good 45 min to an hour away from our apartment.
I know I could take them to the nearest public school, but that doesn't feel good to me. We have a community at their school in the mountains. The kids have learned to knit, to garden , to play violin, and have freedom to make choices. I am grateful they are, and have been, at this school we love and cherish.
Right now I have to pick them up early so I can make it to work on time. The older ones watch my younger ones while I am working. Not ideal, but needed for now. They are bummed about it and want me to get situated so they can stay all week, for full school days. I am working on getting daycare set up... that is my next goal.
Life is getting settled and I am grateful for the stability.... a little tired, but I got this. I know we are a strong enough family unit to attain that next goal... and the next, and the next. ;)
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
A Beautiful Stranger
My day started off slow and unproductive, but tonight was incredible.
I am so in love! I'm so in love with my job! I get to nourish and feed people with organic produce and herbal, natural supplements. I am in my zone and enjoying my passions in life. I am loving my coworkers and customers. I have already met SO many beautiful souls.
I was doing my thing tonight with a genuine smile and love for everyone that was coming to the juice bar. There were some super amazing people coming through my line. I had conversations ranging from someone who had a passion for knowledge in general, to people skills, the purpose of life, life dreams and goals, family, illnesses, and the list goes on.
There was one gentleman in his late 50's or early 60's I would guess. He was in with his daughters and/or granddaughters? They were wanting some Gelato (ice cream). I was giving them generous samples and really enjoying their presence. I hooked them up with big, beautiful bowls of their favorite flavors. The gentleman was telling me he wanted me to ring him up. I explained that I hadn't been trained on the register and couldn't do that. I pointed him over to a register and told him the cashier would take care of him. He proceeded to tell me he wanted me to do it and I needed to walk over to the register with him. So, I walked over with him to make him comfortable. He owed the cashier $10 for the ice cream he purchased. I told him thank you and headed back to the juice bar. He followed me back to the juice bar and held his hand out in a fist. He said he had something for me. I advised him that we don't accept tips at this store but that the thought was enough... I was grateful he even wanted to tip me. He insisted and said he was from Wyoming, so that didn't pertain to him and that I needed to hold out my hand. I did. The man tipped me $40! I couldn't believe it! He said I had the most positive attitude and was so helpful to his family... he wanted me to have that. He walked away swiftly and I stood there in awe. Wow, this man just tipped me $40 and there were no strings attached. He wasn't hitting on me and had no other intentions. Wow.... so grateful and surprised.
I continued working and couldn't stop thinking about what had just happened. I was cleaning and decided to take the trash to the bin outside of the store in the front of the building. As I was headed that way, I ran into him and his family again. I expressed how amazed, appreciative and grateful I was. I told him he made my night. He said he was really glad to hear that. I also informed him that I was a single mama of six and that $40 was really going to be used for the family. When he heard that, his face lit up and he said he was REALLY glad he did that and thanked me for telling him.
It was a mutual appreciation for the other. We both walked away smiling and feeling grateful. What a beautiful stranger.
I am so in love! I'm so in love with my job! I get to nourish and feed people with organic produce and herbal, natural supplements. I am in my zone and enjoying my passions in life. I am loving my coworkers and customers. I have already met SO many beautiful souls.
I was doing my thing tonight with a genuine smile and love for everyone that was coming to the juice bar. There were some super amazing people coming through my line. I had conversations ranging from someone who had a passion for knowledge in general, to people skills, the purpose of life, life dreams and goals, family, illnesses, and the list goes on.
There was one gentleman in his late 50's or early 60's I would guess. He was in with his daughters and/or granddaughters? They were wanting some Gelato (ice cream). I was giving them generous samples and really enjoying their presence. I hooked them up with big, beautiful bowls of their favorite flavors. The gentleman was telling me he wanted me to ring him up. I explained that I hadn't been trained on the register and couldn't do that. I pointed him over to a register and told him the cashier would take care of him. He proceeded to tell me he wanted me to do it and I needed to walk over to the register with him. So, I walked over with him to make him comfortable. He owed the cashier $10 for the ice cream he purchased. I told him thank you and headed back to the juice bar. He followed me back to the juice bar and held his hand out in a fist. He said he had something for me. I advised him that we don't accept tips at this store but that the thought was enough... I was grateful he even wanted to tip me. He insisted and said he was from Wyoming, so that didn't pertain to him and that I needed to hold out my hand. I did. The man tipped me $40! I couldn't believe it! He said I had the most positive attitude and was so helpful to his family... he wanted me to have that. He walked away swiftly and I stood there in awe. Wow, this man just tipped me $40 and there were no strings attached. He wasn't hitting on me and had no other intentions. Wow.... so grateful and surprised.
I continued working and couldn't stop thinking about what had just happened. I was cleaning and decided to take the trash to the bin outside of the store in the front of the building. As I was headed that way, I ran into him and his family again. I expressed how amazed, appreciative and grateful I was. I told him he made my night. He said he was really glad to hear that. I also informed him that I was a single mama of six and that $40 was really going to be used for the family. When he heard that, his face lit up and he said he was REALLY glad he did that and thanked me for telling him.
It was a mutual appreciation for the other. We both walked away smiling and feeling grateful. What a beautiful stranger.
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